sadly i don't know...

I don't have anything to say but i actually want to write. So perhaps this Blog entry will be of nothing? Or maybe everything.

I sometimes wonder to my self, if i sound really attractive in writing or not? Many people like me by the way i talk on the Computer or the way I write. I've honestly sense I've actually gotten in to social pages on the internet I seem to be getting many admirers. Strange, is there something about the way i talk? I talk the same as i would in real life. why the more attraction from males in the internet? In real life it seems that females find me more attractive. strange, I don't try to dress like gay.... So why do girls like me? I don't think i look like gay! but what ever. I guess all of this has something to do with the way i talk?
well i don't think i will come up with an answer to that, seeing as the people i ask "do i look gay?" too say "no" which i think its because they don't want to hurt my feelings bahhaha!


ok, now for another pointless subject....
In other news!!!!! my dreams of a band are getting nowhere fast!!! what in the hell man!!!! I guess I'm wanting to share this dream with the wrong people. Or maybe i'm just counting on every one around me. My friends are Special, they are wonderful people and i love them to death. I just sometimes wish they would work harder when it came to music. But that doesn't mean that they should try all their best and I shouldn't work on my own dream. I also have been slacking on my piano and Drumming. The only thing i have been working a little on in the Shower is my singing voice, or when i have time to my self. I don't think I'm bad at it.
Honestly i need to work hard! i know that i don't have talent to just be wasted! I will not let my self be dragged down because I'm to scared to stand up by my self.

Other then this Dream not being realized, and my Womanizing ways [O.O really!?!] I have no new stories to tell that haven't already been told by others heh heh.

Oh there is one more thing! I'm totally in love with my face! what?! me! Ms. I'm to ugly to love?!
Yep its true! its so true that in my good days I would fall in love with my face. As an Artist its easy to see the Beauty in things, the differences, the ugly, and the wonderful. I think my face is something that only another Artist might admire. The only curse is that i tend to pay to much attention to little things that will change my mind about things and people, I can't do with just one look, it must be long and hard, and when i can honestly call something beautiful and or Attractive it really must be.
I think I'm uver sexy in the face and i really would like more people to see it! [ahhahaha!! i'm so funny]

Anyways I'm guessing I'm done with this entry.

IN SOME WAYS....

I've decided that i will dye my hair Blond next. its about time i think!! its turning orange after the pink! i really need to take care of this problem!

anyways I've also decided that my life will be ruled from now on, till I feel its time to stop, by Exercise, good food, music and women. [bahhahhaaa!! forget the last part!]  I think its about time that I take things more serious when it comes to my physical. I really want to hit my goal! And its about time that i really push my self to the max. Because this shit wont slide anymore! I want to do so much! I want to be so much and not even pushing my self and using the word Try isn't making me get any better or any more closer to my goal! 

I have a lot of people I admire right now, many of them set good influences on me, All of them are Men. [baahahahaaa!! sucks because men are wired differently then women. but i will do my best!] I think that the worst influence they have on my is Dyeing my hair! which to me is not as bad as Alcohol, because my hair is what makes me "ME" and with it all tattered and messed up I will cry! haha! just kidding! anyways.

In some ways I really would like to follow their foot steps. I might not make it out of this place and out in the world like them but... I think that in some ways I can have a shot at at least looking as fly and cool like them. I already think I can be as cool [AAHHHAHA! in my dreams] but i still need some work.

I feel that someday i will be someone that some people will look up to. [that's a lot of some's]

Till then i need to grow and start changing the bad to good as soon as I can! because like it or not appearances can be everything, it can limit you and it can also bust you up! don't believe me? Open your eyes and look at the TV.

Anyways looking to be great someday.

ms. Changes